Hello and welcome! Congratulations on your engagement to be married. If you are interested in having your wedding at St. Benedict, please contact our Parish Administrator, Father Ray Guthrie (262-248-8524, guthrier@sfdslg.org,) to check on availability. You must contact the parish at least 6 months prior to the requested wedding date. This is the time needed to complete your required marriage preparation. We suggest that you contact the parish office prior to arranging a date with a reception venue or caterer.
We allow two weddings per weekend (Friday-Saturday).
Fridays – 2:00 pm
Saturdays – 2:00 pm
The rehearsal most often takes place the evening before the wedding. The time for the rehearsal must be arranged with the parish priest. Plan on the rehearsal lasting about one hour.
Weddings are not permitted during Advent or Lent.
Outline of Your Preparation
Preparing for Marriage, in any Catholic parish in Wisconsin, includes three basic areas:
- Assessment
- Instruction
- Liturgical Planning
Assessment includes your initial meetings with the parish priest (usually twice). A questionnaire called FOCCUS will be completed during one of your visits with the parish priest. The priest will “assess” your readiness to marry with the help of the FOCCUS questionnaire.
Instructions are provided by the Archdiocese of Milwaukee at various locations throughout Southeast Wisconsin. A brochure entitled “Enrichment for the Engaged” provides a listing of dates, a description of the workshops and retreats, and a registration form. This brochure can be found at https://www.archmil.org/MarriagePreparation . You must register online.
Liturgical planning for your wedding ceremony is guided by the parish priest and the pastoral musician.
The parish provides you with Together for Life, a planning book for the ceremony. The final planning session with the priest performing the ceremony usually occurs about one month prior to the wedding date. The parish priest needs to be made aware of any special requests and/or circumstances, such as guest celebrants.
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Wedding Music
As a member of the Parish Pastoral Staff, it is the Music Director’s responsibility to oversee the application of our parish’s policy to all music performed during every marriage ceremony here at Saint Benedict.
The suitability of music for worship is determined through the following judgments:
MUSICAL JUDGMENT asks whether or not this music is technically, aesthetically and expressively good.
LITURGICAL JUDGMENT asks whether or not the music, and especially the words, are appropriate for a service of worship and are in keeping with a full understanding of the Sacrament of Marriage.
PASTORAL JUDGMENT is the ‘here and now’ judgment. It evaluates the music in terms of its ability to enable the people gathered for this specific occasion, in this place, to express their faith through this celebration.
It is the policy of St. Benedict Parish that our Music Director, Stacey Bassetti, and a St. Benedict Parish cantor will lead the music at your wedding. Any guest soloists or instrumentalists must be approved by the Director of Music and will be under the direction of the Director of Music.
St. Benedict has many talented accompanists and cantors. Our policy is that you use our musicians. You may add guest soloists for some special music and instrumentalists if you would like.
Wedding Music Guidelines
Because the Marriage Rite is a liturgical celebration, it calls for liturgical music. The requirements for music at the wedding liturgy are the same as for Sunday Mass or any other liturgical celebration. Each piece of music for the liturgy needs to be evaluated according to liturgical, pastoral, and musical criteria:
Is it connected to the liturgical action and does it use a text suitable for that particular part of the rite?
Does it draw the gathered assembly more deeply into the holy things being celebrated?
Is the music of good quality, capable of expressing the profound mystery of God’s love?
These criteria are drawn from the U.S. bishops’ music guidelines, Sing to the Lord: Music in Divine Worship, which states…when selecting music for your wedding, there are three basic criteria:
1) Music must be able to be sung by the assembly.
2) Music must fit the spirit and structure of the liturgy.
3) Music must be of high quality and appropriate content.
The music selected for use within the wedding liturgy (whether or not that includes the Liturgy of the Eucharist) must speak of Christian marriage as a covenant involving not only a man and a woman, but also God. Wedding music should therefore, be a prayerful expression of the commitment the couple makes in the presence of other Christians. It should also be music that can involve all who are present in the praise and worship of God.
There are many songs to choose from within both the contemporary and traditional music styles that fit the above criterion. Stacey Bassetti, the Director of Music will assist you in planning the music for your wedding.